Frustrations, life, and Flagstaff

So I'm finally back in Flagstaff for my last semester actually taking classes at NAU. I am so happy to be back here, but I am also let down in some ways. I guess I thought things would be a bit different than I expected. I guess I expected some things to be different and they're not and it's frustrating. I suppose I am kind of lonely. Thats not really it, but that is the best way to describe it. I love my friends though, and I am so glad to be back here with them.

I find the best remedy to my frustrations is to run and talk with God. So I went running along the Urban trail and talked with God. I probably should've been listening more, but I was pretty upset and just needed to vent. I'm trying to listen better now though.
Can I just say that I find nothing more pleasurable than running in God's creation in Flagstaff. It rained today too and so the trees smelled like vanilla and I could smell like that earthy smell that permeates throughout the woods after a good rain. I loved it. Its makes me wonder if I really do want to leave Flagstaff. Plus its not just anywhere that you can run and find a view like this:



Ok so there is no snow up there right now, but you get the picture...which reminds me, now that I am back in flag, I NEED to start taking more photos again.
Anyway, I'm glad I went on my run and talked with God, and continue to. I do not understand what He is doing and I'm frustrated because I don't understand and it seems so unfair, but He does know better than we do. I guess I still have to keep pressing on.

All I need to say

is...

I hope you grow, and change, and I hope this is for real. You've said you were going to change before, and it didn't happen. Maybe I was too easy on you.
I'm not going to be this time.
The crazy thing is I realized I didn't necessarily do it for me, I did it for you.


Words of Wisdom:
Grow up, in general, everyone needs to change and grow up. Every single day this needs to happen, otherwise we are doomed to repeat our mistakes.

I've grown up a lot this summer with all that has happened, but I still have a long way to go.

LA Fitness, Michael Phelps and running thoughts

I am now a runner....
kind of.
I've started training for my half marathon in January and it's been a pretty good two weeks or so. I'm running three miles consistently, which believe it or not, is good for me because frankly I SUCK at running. Anyway, it's been WAY to frickin hot to run outside, even at 7 am, so I've been going to LA fitness to run on the treadmills.
I know running on the treadmill is easier, but I'm sorry, I'm not getting up at 7am my last few weeks of summer and I am NOT running in 100+ degree heat. So, to LA Fitness I go 6 days a week to run. I find running gives me time to think and to listen awesome music and lately watch the amazingness that is MICHAEL PHELPS....



Needless to say watching him swim for our country in the olympics, inspires me to push on and run. The Man is a fish I swear to God.
Anyway, back to LA Fitness. As much as I enjoy running in a cool environment that enables me to watch the hottest swimmer in history, I do not enjoy being around people when I work out. It bothers me. I am either annoyed by people or fear I am annoying others. Also, I hate when people see me while I'm working out or afterwards...cuz frankly I look like hell. Literally...
Also, I have a thing where I don't like people I don't know using the treadmill or elliptical or bike or whatever I may be using next to me. It makes me feel self conscious or I get annoyed cuz they're talking on the phone or to the person next to them or something. Seriously....it's gym...why would you be on the phone when all the other person can hear is you breathing heavily into their ear. That's awkward.
Also, I am unbelievably paranoid I am going to get ringworm or something.
Gross.

Words of wisdom:
Apparently Lifetime Fitness is the place to be....so invest in that instead of LA Fitness or something. You may feel cleaner and there will be less people from your high school senior class there to judge you and the 30 lbs you've gained.